I traveled a lot more than I’d intended to during the first few months of this year. Now that we live in Utah, I was trying to stick around for ski season as much as possible, but work had other plans, so here we are. During these trips, I started writing down things that should be common knowledge for plane etiquette, but apparently aren’t. Hey, we all have our coping mechanisms.

1. Don’t smell (like anything, ideally)

Starting strong, I know.

The proliferation of extreme B.O. on planes is wild. If you know you’re about to sit in a tiny tin can, packed in like sardines with a zillion other people, please do those people the courtesy of showering and using deodorant. No one else wants to smell you. Trust me.

And please, PLEASE go easy on the perfume. Yes, perfume is generally better than B.O., but in small spaces, it can be really overwhelming to the people sitting next to you.

2. Use headphones

Airlines have started enforcing this one a lot more recently, and I’m here for it. Particularly on airlines that provide free in-flight WiFi (thanks, Delta!!), you might be inclined to spend the flight browsing TikTok or Instagram (yes, I have watched someone scroll through videos for the entire duration of a flight…not my cup of tea, but to each their own). If you do this, please use headphones or make sure your phone is on silent.

Honestly, this same rule applies to in the airport. The number of people who make FaceTime calls without headphones is wild. You have two options – use headphones, or (dare I say it) turn off speakerphone and hold the phone up to your ear. Revolutionary, I know.

3. Yes, everyone around you can smell your farts. You’re not as subtle as you think you are.

The change in air pressure combined with the in-flight soda can really mess with your gut. I get it. But know yourself – consider opting for a beverage that isn’t carbonated, or bring some over the counter medications to help mitigate the symptoms.

Please. I’m begging you.

4. Unless you are actively seeking revenge on the people around you, sit down gently to avoid shaking every seat in the vicinity. 

Any time you stand up or sit down, the people in your row can feel it. Anytime you contact the seat in front of you, even if it’s for something relatively benign like lowering your tray table, the person in front of you can feel it.

Keep that in mind, and please be gentle when moving around. Knowing that others can feel nearly every movement you make is the first step towards being a more considerate passenger.

If you’re traveling with kids, please help them with this. I completely understand that children may hate sitting still for that long (I get it, really!) but maybe try to keep them from kicking the seat in front of them for the entire duration of the flight. Several times, I’ve been physically kicked by the children sitting behind me (not my seat, me personally). One flight, I was kicked in the face and the shoulder for a couple of hours by an angry lap child sitting next to me. I want very badly to be accommodating for kids on planes – I was once one too – but please, try to limit the impact to the people around you.

5. Don’t take your shoes off on domestic flights

If you’re on a 14 hour flight to Australia, sure – go for it (but always put your shoes back on to walk in the aisle or go to the bathroom!). If you’re on a 2 hour domestic flight, I think you’ll probably survive with your shoes on for that long. The rest of us really don’t need to encounter your smelly feet.

6. Have your boarding pass (and passport, if flying internationally) ready when boarding

Don’t be that person who gets to the gate and realizes they need to unlock their phone, find the app, and download their boarding pass. If you’re waiting in line to board, be ready for boarding.

7. Don’t unpack and repack your entire bag while the plane is boarding

This is easily avoidable – pack what you’ll need on the flight in the smaller carryon that goes under the seat in front of you. If you must grab something larger – say a laptop – from your larger carryon, put it in an easily accessible pocket. Please don’t be that person who gets to their seat, unpacks half of their bag, puts the bag overheard, realizes they forgot something, and starts the whole process over again.

8. While we’re on the topic of bags, make sure you can at least mostly lift your own bag.

This was my parents’ rule when I was a kid, and I still hold true to this one. Packing light is an art form – and it’s well worth learning, in my opinion. It’s so freeing to be able to travel with a light backpack that you can easily toss into the overhead bin on your own while a dozen people stare you down, waiting to get to their seat, is truly a game changer.

Need advice on how to pack light? Check out my packing lists! I have a work trip packing list. I often will also use this list for vacations.

9. Avoid excessive physical contact with other passengers

“Don’t touch strangers” feels like an obvious one, and you’d think it would be even more obvious when you’re stuffed into a small metal tube with a bunch of the aforementioned strangers. Unfortunately, I do think this one needs to be stated explicitly.

For a particularly shining example of a time when someone needed this message, I once sat on a plane with a couple who were…sloshed, to say the least. The wife read things on my laptop and proceeded to ask me about them (I was on a work trip, so I was using the time to catch up on email…needless to say, I’ve since purchased a privacy screen for my laptop). The husband, who was sitting in the aisle seat (I was in the window seat), reached across his wife to rub my leg to ask me to open the window for him. This was not a gentle tap or quick nudge – he was actually rubbing my leg. So weird. So unnecessary. Don’t be that guy, please.

10. Only use the overhead light if you actually need it

Because yes, it does shine in everyone else’s eyes.

If you’re reading a paper book or working on editing physical papers, go for it! Use that light! And props to you for valuing a book of papers enough to bring a physical copy of something with you.

But if you aren’t actually using the light, please turn it off. It’s very bright for everyone around you, who may be trying to sleep or work on their laptops.

11. Don’t recline your seat on domestic flights or in economy on international flights

Ok, I’m ending with a highly controversial one. Please don’t cancel me for this.

Your slight increase in comfort is not worth the enormous discomfort you put on the person behind you. At the end of the day, it’s a self-perpetuating problem – if one person reclines, then the rest of the people behind him or her have to as well.

You can probably survive a 3 hour domestic flight without reclining your seat. The person behind you will thank you for it. As someone who frequently works on planes, it is often impossible to open a laptop to 90 degrees if the person in front of you reclines (sometimes, it’s hard to fully open a laptop even without them reclining).

On long international flights, you may think you’ll be uncomfortable without reclining your seat. However, have you ever tried putting your blanket or an extra pillow behind you for lumbar support? It’s a game changer, really. I think it feels a lot better than the 1.3″ of extra recline you get from reclining your seat.

If you absolutely must recline your seat on an international flight – make sure you put your seat back up during meal service. It’s just common courtesy.

Conclusion: we’re all in this tube together

At the end of the day, a little situational awareness goes a long way. I know air travel can be stressful—between the TSA lines, flight delays, and the lackluster terminal coffee, we’re all just trying to get from Point A to Point B with our sanity (mostly) intact. But remember: your fellow passengers are all in the exact same boat (or, well, metal tube).

Being a “good traveler” isn’t about being perfect; it’s just about acknowledging that the person sitting next to you is a human being who also appreciates legroom, fresh air, and not being kicked in the face. So, the next time you’re tempted to recline that seat or skip the deodorant before a red-eye, take a deep breath and think of your fellow travelers. We’ll all have a much better flight for it.

Now, I’m stepping off my soapbox and heading back to the mountains.